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Life as Alicia - Chapter One
This story deals with mental health issues that may be triggering for some people. Hope you all enjoy!

Alicia never thought she was pretty. She was never the optimistic girl that everyone saw. She never had high self esteem. But she never had felt like this...



Looking off into the distance, she was thinking about herself. "Why do I feel so down? I haven't done anything. Nothing bad happened to me. So why?" She had less energy than usual the past week. It was like there was a hand pushing her down, making her sink. Alicia was usually an energetic person, so she had no clue what happened. "Am I stressed? But I've had almost no homework the past week. I don't have any today, either. I'll just go to my room and relax."



"I'm just a failure. A stupid failure. I don't deserve all of this, especially when I'm so ungrateful. So why am I just laying here! I should go do something, prove to myself I'm not an idiot. I know what I can do. I'll paint something! Why not?"

Alicia started painting. She knew she wasn't very good, but she didn't know what else to do. She heard a noise, and suddenly turned. Her elbow hit the red paint off the easel, and she lunged.



"I'm not going to catch it. Another failure... I'm so stupid and clumsy. Why do I have to be like this?" The paint fell, splattering to the floor. She sprinted to get paper towels and other cleaning supplies. None of it got all of the paint out. A huge red stain was left on the carpet.



"Mom's going to be so mad at me. I deserve punishment too... for being a stupid, ugly, disgusting, clumsy, horrible failure."

Alicia spent the rest of the night in her room, partly for punishment, and partly because she couldn't bear to face anyone.
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